The truth is, I have spent the past week cataloguing lots of daily events to use on this blog, but after this past weekends news cycle, my mind is stuck in the horror that is infant rape. Two cases broke this weekend in areas surrounding my city in which individuals have been caught after taping themselves raping infants...that's right...babies, children under three years old. Little innocent beings that have no words, no ability to fight back, and who have done no wrong! I can't even begin to wrap my mind around these acts. I can't put into words the disgust, the disappointment in humanity, the hurt, the anger, the fear I feel. I want to just go back to ignorance, to the belief that it only happens in cases in which the parents are doped up, that my girls will never face this, that it doesn't happen "in my world". Granted, I am not the horrible excuse for a mother who offers up my 4 month old to 'spice up' my sex life, but, I do send them to a day care center...I do put them in other people's care without my presence in the school or the home.
I am having such a hard time putting this all into words...naming all the feelings churning around in my gut....getting past the shock and the shame for not realizing this was a common enough occurrence that I NEED to be ACTIVELY and LEGITIMATELY concerned about it with my own girls. It's crazy to me that not only do I need to teach them to not talk to strangers but also to be wary of people they should be allowed to trust. I don't want to raise girls terrified of everything and everyone, but I also don't want to raise girls who are naïve or may be more likely to be victimized...but, then again, in this case...these assaults are occurring before a child is even able to comprehend my words much less internalize anything I'm trying to teach them about personal safety, boundaries, and awareness.
Every time I want to just shrug it off and go back to my rose colored world of ignorance and bliss, I think about the infants who have experienced this, their pain, fear, the fact their entire world is one of pain. I can't imagine, just typing this past sentence made my stomach drop and my heart speed up...I can't put into words how horrible it must be to never know safety, love, a soft touch--or to equate brutality and pain with those. I can't even begin to imagine a person who is incapable of seeing an infant as a living, breathing being--capable of feelings (both physical and emotional). I don't understand how individual's who use and abuse their infants are able to post photos like those you would see hanging in my home and not see the hideousness in their actions. Finally, I can't even begin to fathom the heartache many children must carry today, those who had these actions occur, who aren't even able to remember or put words to it, but who always have something "off". I can't put it into words, so I beg you all to read the following sections of other articles and be aware of this as a means of attempting to protect your children, others children, and acknowledge that the world is a scary place despite our desire to be ignorant and blissful.
"Sexual assault of infants (babies under the age of 3) is different from pedophilia (sexual arousal/contact with pre-pubescent children over the age of 3). Experts working with sex crimes and psychopathology state that this form of infant rape seems to occur because the rapist does not see the baby before him as a boy or girl - a baby or toddler - or even as a human being. S/He is merely another 'opening' into which to get off on. It is the ultimate case of using and abusing another human being.
Sadly, an obvious question is often brought up in cases like this -- how could someone physically penetrate a baby? After all, this tiny newborn has very tiny everything. And, as horrifying as it is - that is exactly what appeals to those raping an infant. The tight, small space.
This form of sexual assault would obviously hurt a baby to extremes like none other. Babies scream - do all they can to get away (responses that are the same as those we see when babies are genitally cut apart via circumcision). This is why babies are often gagged first by the predator - duct tape over their mouths - something to hold them still, keep them quiet. This little baby likely suffered skull fractures as a result of being held down tightly by Davis while being sexually abused.
The rape of a human being of this small size causes catastrophic internal injuries to various organs, and many babies die. Those brought into emergency rooms after surviving this trauma are often found to have broken spines and collar bones from the weight of a man when he presses upon, or collapses onto, the baby at ejaculation. [Side note: 100% of those charged with infant rape in the United States are male]"
For those of you like me who wonder what you can do...Here are the best tips I could come up with:
1.) Know the warning signs that your infant may be sexually abused/assaulted--there are good lists on babycenter.com and livestrong.com
2.) Be mindful of who you allow in your home and around your children, where they are in your home, and what activities they are participating in.
3.) Drop in on day care centers/babysitters/caregivers at random and unexpected times throughout the day to "pick my child up early" or "drop off something I forgot" or "just because."
4.) Don't allow your rose colored glasses to cloud your Mommy Intuition!--or for that matter your child's "gut instincts" regarding individuals...LISTEN to yourself and your children!
5.) Talk to you children about what is and is not okay for other people to do to their bodies, teach them they can tell people "no" or "please don't touch me" if they don't want individuals touching them...i.e. they don't have to hug an Aunt they have only met twice--in other words, make it okay for your child to become the gatekeeper of their body. Others may argue with me on this, but we are already teaching our children if a stranger or someone besides their immediate caregivers touches them in a way they don't like or touches their "bottoms" they can bite, kick, scream, hit, etc. as much as they need to in order to get the person to leave them alone.
6.) Advocate for those small children without a voice in your neighborhood, city, country, and world--give a voice to their suffering and don't allow others to live in ignorance of it!
Please add to this list and pass this important information on. DO NOT allow yourself or others to live in ignorance of terrible crimes against innocence and humanity like these!
No comments:
Post a Comment